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"We could learn a lot from crayons; some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, while others bright, some have weird names, but they have all learned to live together in the same box!"

Monday, 19 August 2013

Luc lesson

I was chatting to one of my besties (Claire) last week about what makes parenting so hard... And we kind of came to the conclusion (other than the incessant nature of being a parent) it is the overwhelming feeling of not knowing what you are doing...

 <<< Luc and his friend Jude (Claires boy)... We (the mothers) have decided that they will be friends!

I realise the thing Luc is teaching me is to trust myself. I know my boy best, i really do. i know when he isnt himself, when he is tired or sleepy or not feeling well. I know what his silly faces mean, i know what he loves to do, loves to eat and is scheming to do next. i do know this boy.

and i need to trust that.

case in point... Luc and sleeping! He hasnt been sleeping well for about 3 months and i have been at a loss as to what to do. i have read, i have talked to people... Then i talked to another of my besties, Sonja (i am very blessed by a great circle of amazing friends) who asked me what i felt i needed to do and told me that that is what i should do! Sounds so simple... And she was right, the sleeping is much better and improving daily ...

I just needed to trust myself and do what i knew to be best.

<<< Luc and (1 of) dads bikes. Luc loves the bikes...

And so tomorrow my little baby boy will be 1! And i am only figuring out now, bit by bit, how to trust myself in this mothering juggle...

Wednesday, 7 August 2013

First impressions...

Today i assessed a lady for a RAF (road accident fund) claim that has really got me thinking about first impressions...

When i saw the name of the person i was assessing i assumed white person.
When i saw the address of the person i was assessing i assumed indian person.
When she was over an hour late (i am ashamed to admit this but i will) i assumed black person.
When i actually met her- coloured person!
[And this is why preconceived ideas about people are so nonsensical!]

When i met her she was defensive and passive aggressive... maybe because she was an hour late and i took a deep breath and expected the worst of the assessment. But as i learned later it was because she had driven from Mpumalanga and had just worked a night shift and was actually exhausted. And by the end of the assessment we were joking together and comfortable with each other. Must be my sparkling, engaging personality?!

This lady also made a comment in the assessment " If i was a white person i would call it..." which again tells me she came into  the assessment with her own preconceived ideas about me and my whiteness. And i guess i am very white, even albino(ish) a colleague used to tell me.

i wonder if her first impression of me would have been different if she had seen a family photo before arriving!
i wonder if my first impression of her would have been different if i had seen a photo of her before arriving!

At the end of the day it shouldn't make a difference should it?

Monday, 5 August 2013

Luc lesson

Just a short Luc lesson...

You need far less sleep than you think you do!

Luc has been sick and before that teething (my scapegoat whenever anything goes wrong) so there is not a whole bunch of sleeping happening in the Gradidge home.

But my real lesson has been in telling Philippe when i am not coping and asking for help... No body was benefiting from me playing the hero.

<<< Luc has discovered the joys of the bathroom and especially flushing the toilet.
What a happy cutey pie!